The Anti-EULA

I'm sick of seeing confidentiality notices at the bottom of emails. This one was at the bottom of an email telling me when we would leave this weekend:

CONFIDENTIALITY NOTICE: This e-mail may contain information that is privileged and confidential. If you are not the intended recipient of this e-mail, please notify the sender immediately by return e-mail, purge it and do not disseminate or copy it. Thank you.

Or this one on an email telling me what keys a bunch of songs were in:

Caution: The information in this e-mail and any attachments is
confidential, and may be legally privileged. If you are not an
addressee you may not copy, distribute, disclose or disseminate to
another person or place any reliance on it. If this e-mail has been
sent to you in error, please notify the sender immediately by e-mail and
delete it from your system.

What do they think this will protect them from? Who suddenly decided we need these? If a "bad guy" is going to do something bad, I'm sure these paragraphs would not stop him.

Well, the folks at Reasonable Agreement have the answer. The anti-EULA (End User License Agreement)

READ CAREFULLY. By [accepting this material|accepting this payment|accepting this business-card|viewing this t-shirt|reading this sticker] you agree, on behalf of your employer, to release me from all obligations and waivers arising from any and all NON-NEGOTIATED agreements, licenses, terms-of-service, shrinkwrap, clickwrap, browsewrap, confidentiality, non-disclosure, non-compete and acceptable use policies ("BOGUS AGREEMENTS") that I have entered into with your employer, its partners, licensors, agents and assigns, in perpetuity, without prejudice to my ongoing rights and privileges. You further represent that you have the authority to release me from any BOGUS AGREEMENTS on behalf of your employer.

Amen.